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2004 Updates |
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Jan 2005
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Feb 2005
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March 2005
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April 2005
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Update on Mel 4/4 |
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Update on Mel 4/5 |
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Update on Mel 4/6 |
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Update on Mel 4/7 |
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Update on Mel 4/8 |
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Update on Mel 4/9 |
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Update on Mel 4/10 |
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Update on Mel 4/11 |
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May 2005
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June 2005
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August 2005
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September 2005
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October
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March 2006
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April 2006
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August 2006
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October 2006
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Update on Mel 1/02
Mel was pretty giggly for most of the day today. She
did get a little upset tonight worrying about tomorrows MRI. And she did get
upset when she couldn’t go to SUPER WAL-MART with Mom today. It was cold and
starting to rain, AGAIN. It was for the best though Deb needs some time away
from the house.
Mel did a lot of work book stuff today, and watched a
movie. Allison and Skye came over this evening but it seemed like Mel
watched them more than anything else.
Aunt Sissy made dinner tonight and brought it over to
the house. Thanks Sis! Mel pretty much ate most of the night getting
prepared for tomorrows NO eating and only clear fluids until knockout time.
OH boy is she going to be hungry when she wakes up.
Mel’s right hand is still not working the way it should
and, the right foot is still dragging a bit. The MRI is good timing. I am
praying it is just swelling around the tumor and not the tumor it’s self. We
will find out soon enough I guess.
Deb seems to be getting worse. I hope it is just
anxiety before the MRI. But I am afraid it is more then that.
Please remember Mel, Deb, Devin, and all our little
friends and there families in your prayers tonight. I am not sure how much
longer I can hold it all together. But I know with many, many prayers from
you and myself, I will make it. Please pray for a good reading of the MRI
tomorrow and PRAY FOR A MIRACLE!
Good Night and God Bless
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/03
It was a long and rainy day for us. Our day started
early 4am early. Mine started a little earlier 3am.
Melody, Mommy, and Bammom started out at 5am for San
Diego and what wound up being a 2 + hour trip down in the rain. I meet the
ladies at Children’s Hospital at 7am to check in and get Mel’s paper work
all done and then we waited about ½ hr. for someone to come and get us to do
the MRI.
The MRI for the most part was uneventful. The put Mel
to sleep in her chair and then we lifted her up onto the bed and in She
went. Deb got a little upset when Mel’s breathing sounded different kind of
shallow but the doctor assured her it was normal. After the MRI she went to
recovery and woke up pretty fast and, wanted right away to get back in her
chair because her sides were hurting form lying flat. She had a rough time
with waking up and it took us about an hour to get out of there for a
sandwich. But we made it out and made it home….. Wait a second let me back
up a bit. On the way home we had to stop by Toy-R-Us, it on the way. Mel had
a couple of gift cards burning a hole on her pocket. Let’s see she got a few
karaoke CD’s, a Hello Kitty work center, and are you ready for this a Hello
Kitty refrigerator. What a stinker!
We haven’t done much since getting home Mel isn’t right
today I hope it’s because of the anesthetic. Her hand and foot still aren’t
right and she complained of a headache this evening. We are hoping the
headache was because she was hungry she hasn’t eaten much today. As a matter
of fact Deb is out at Mac Donald’s right now getting a happy meal for the
little stinker.
I must say Mel has been pretty giggly today and fro the
most part Deb is hanging in there pretty well. If she is as antsy as I am
waiting for the results then she is handling it pretty well or hide it
pretty well.
We are just going to hang out tonight watching a little
TV and go to bed really early tonight.
Thank you for all the prayers and guest book entries.
Please keep them both coming. They are priceless, and nothing compares to
either of them. Please remember all the other kids and there families in
your prayers tonight.
As soon as we hear about the results of the MRI, I will
post them so keep checking back. Good night and God Bless you all.
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/4
Not much to write about today. Today was a boring,
lazy day for the most part. Melody woke up with a bellyache that lasted
until she really ate well. From not eating much yesterday I think she was
over hungry to the point she was nauseous and nothing sounded good. She
mostly watched TV and worked in workbooks today. Also, I went and checked
her PO Box and she had a ton of mail and packages. That was fun for a
little while. Tonight the cousins are over visiting.
No news yet on yesterdays MRI. We are anxiously
awaiting a call from Children’s. Praying for a call with good news; afraid
to get a call with bad news.
Please continue to pray for Melody’s earthly healing.
I can’t bear the thought of not having her. Thank you.
Goodnight and God bless each and every one of you
Melody’s Mommy
Debbie
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Update on Mel 1/5
Our hearts are breaking tonight. The news is not what
we were hoping for. However we have not given up hope! There is no change in
the tumor however there are new tumor like things happen in the ventricles
and in the gray madder of the brain. There are no other avenues that are
going to make this go away. There are other chemo options that may or may
not slow the progress.
Debbie and I have decided to continue with the Temador
and the Protocel. The Temador has been known to stop or slow things down
some. But there really is not much chance of stopping it completely or at
all for the matter. We said from day one that we would not let her suffer or
be in pain if we had a choice. The other chemo’s will likely make her sick
and loose her hair. There is little or no chance that it will even help
matters. What kind of life is that for anyone let alone our only daughter
who is one of the most important things in our lives along with Devin.
I don’t know if this will make any sense but it wasn’t
that hard to make that decision but at the same time it is the most
difficult choice we have ever had to make in our lives. If I knew there were
any chance that something else would make this all go away I would give it
to her. But in my heart I know that this is the best thing we can do for
her.
We will make every minute count, every day something
special just as we always have tried. We will have our up days and our down
days just like we always have. There must be something really special that
God has planned for Melody and our family.
I don’t really know what else to say at best we have 3
to 6 months with our precious princess. There are so many things I want to
say and so many things I want to do but my brain isn't working very well right
now. I can’t seem to get things out and on to this update.
Deb is doing surprisingly well. In our hearts I guess
we knew this was inevitable. Our hearts ache like nothing I have ever felt
before. But I know it will all be for the best for Melody.
Although someday in the near future Melody will be
dancing on the clouds and celebrating Jesus’ next birthday with him jumping
up and down asking over and over and over if she can help blow out the
candles with him. I not sure what I was going to say next see it’s that
brain thing not working again. But I will leave that thought here.
I am sorry that this is the news I have to share with
you all. It has been the hardest things I have ever had to write in my life.
Please do not stop praying for a miracle. God has done crazier things. (the
platypus) ;-)
Melody has been in a great mood all day long. Giggling
and laughing except when Bammom made her cry….twice. She still loves you mom
she told me so.
God bless us all and may he give us the strength to get
us through this.
Melody’s Daddy FOREVER!
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/6
It’s been kind of a somber day here. Not a whole lot to
say. I stayed home from work today and Devin home from school. We just
wanted to be together as a family. We even all went to the small together
today.
I want to tell you all what Melody and Devin know.
Melody doesn’t know what the final out come will be yet. We will tell her
when the time is right and that is not now. So please remember that in your
visits. Devin does know. We thought it only fair to tell him so he would
know why we are as upset as we are. He does really understand I don’t think.
He is angry, he thinks with God. After we told him he went into the living
room and lit some candles and prayed. We all three cried together while Mrs.
Friend did school work with Melody. Her timing was impeccable.
Mel did a lot of work book stuff today and watched some
TV. Allison and Skye came over for a visit this evening. Mel is doing her
homework right now. Mel wasn't as happy today as yesterday but we did have some
great giggly moments.
Deb has her first appointment tomorrow with her
physiatrists. I am so glad it finally worked out and she can go. They were
playing phone tag for about a week.
I am simply amazed at the amount of visits to Mel’s web
page and all the guest book entries as well. Although in contrast to the
visits the guest book entries are small over 800 visits today. I understand
though that the words are hard to find sometimes. Just a simple hello and we
are thinking about you can go a long, long way. So please leave us a message
if you have a minute or two. Also please, please keep coming back and
visiting us. Just seeing how many people are watching our little princess’s
journey touches our hearts so very, very much.
We are not angry. We are not mad. We are just
heartbroken. I do not blame God or anyone or anything. This is the life we
have been given and we will live it to the best of our abilities. What ever
God has planned for us we will take it and do with it the best we know how.
He must have something big for us to do with horrid disease.
Thank you so much for all the prayers for Melody,
Devin, Deb and I. They are much needed. Thank you for understanding and
respecting the decision we have made. I hope you never have to make it.
Please remember in your prayers all our caringbridge kids and there families
that we have come to know and love so much, and all the parents tonight who
are with out there little ones whom they love so much. Live each day as it
is the last. Give your kids your family and your friends hug everyday and
tell them how much they mean to you, tell them how much you love them. And
have no regrets!
Please pray for Mel’s miracle!
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/7
It’s been a pretty good day. Mel wasn’t necessarily in
a good mood today but not necessarily in a bad mood either. Just kind of
quite toady. She didn’t do much either some work book stuff, some TV, and
her cousins came over to play this evening. Curt and Megan came over for a
visit as well bringing dinner along with them. Panda Express. Mmmmmm (think
of Homer Simpson) Chinese food, well sort of anyway. We have had any in a
while so it was really good. Thanks Curt for the good food and great
conversations even if I did most of the talking.
Mel did get her giggles going a few times today and
some tonight. Allison and Skye can really make her laugh. They are cleaning
up to go home for the night. I’m sure they will be over tomorrow at some
point.
It has been ANOTHER rainy day here in So. Cal. It is
supposed to rain through Monday and into Tuesday. Mel and I were supposed to
go out and play in it today but it was a little colder than expected. Maybe
tomorrow, it’s supposed to be a little warmer storm. Don’t let my “ANOTHER”
fool you we don’t get weather like this very often so we get excited when we
do get it.
Deb and I are emotionally exhausted but, some how the
tears keep coming. Nothing special needs to be said or thought of sometimes
they just start. Even at work today on my break in the morning there they
were. I think the wind blew in the wrong direction or something. Who knows!
I did check on all our caringbridge friends today but I
with being awake since 3 O’clock this morning my brain isn’t working really
good right now. I want to ask you for some special prayers for a few of the
kids put the only one that is popping into my head right now is
Emerald. She had surgery today and they were able to remove 90% of her
tumor. Thanks be to God! She is in PICU tonight and her mom Kimberly is
unable to sleep there with her (what a stupid rule). She is having some
expected problems. Please say a special prayer for her and her family
tonight. As well as all the other kids and there families.
Thank you for all the prayers for Melody and our
Family. Thank you so much for all the guest book entries. Just a few words
from a stranger or a friend can carry us trough the day. They mean so much
to us you have no idea. Thank you for all the emails I will make my best
attempt to get back to you. We are so far behind on our thank you cards I
don’t think we will ever catch up. I’m talking thousands behind you all
amaze me. Please continue to keep the prayers for Mel’s miracle, strength
for our family and guest book entries coming.
Good night and God bless you all
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
P.S. - Go Chargers!!!! Good luck in the playoffs.
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Update on Mel 1/8
Well another day without a lot to talk about. Mel did
watched Shrek 2 again, did a lot of cross word puzzles, and did some math in
one of her work books. The cousins came over for in the evening while Devin
and I joined friends and family watched the Chargers loose to the jets in
OT. Its 10 min. to 10:00 and the girls just left.
Deb is kind of quite today. I think it is the
medication. Grammy and I talked this morning and watched the rain together.
Mostly about Deb and what she is feeling.
Thank you for all the prayers for Melody and our
family. Thank you again for all the prayers for all our caringbridge friends
and there families. I am sorry it’s a short update tonight. MAYBE I’ll get
in to things more tomorrow.
God bless you all and thank you for everything.
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/9
It’s been a wet and uneventful day here. Not much to
say about it except we got a butt load of rain toady and the three days
prior. Mel never did make it out to play in it but, Devin and I had a snow
ball fight with the snow that Mike and Cindy brought down from the local
mountains. (Devin lost ;-) )
Let’s see what my little stinker did today. Lots of
cross word puzzles, lots of word jumbles, and lots of these, see how many
words you can make out of these words puzzles. Now let me tell you! If it
weren’t for the spell check on this word processor you wouldn’t understand a
dam thing that I write. Mel also watched a couple of movies and some
cartoons today, played with her cousins, and made a gift for someone very
special to her. I am not going to say because I do not want to give away the
surprise.
At 3:30 I had to finally tell Deb to get off her
feeling sorry but, take a shower and go pick up her prescriptions. Now I am
not saying she doesn’t do anything she does a lot a round her mostly with
Mel. She made a huge breakfast this morning and she absolutely everything
for Mel. I just had a talk with Mel and asked her to let Bammom do more for
her this week and to try and give Mommy a break. She did let me take her
potty a few times while Mommy was out and about and even while she (Mommy)
is sleeping in the recliner.
Well that’s about it for tonight. I really can’t think
of anything else to say. I am feeling guilty about telling Deb what I told
her to do today. I did apologize to her but I am afraid it was too much to
even say to her. I just do not want her to waste any days moping around.
Deb’s mood sets the tone in the house and lately the tone has not been good.
It rubs off on everyone especially Mel. When Debs not happy Mel’s not happy,
and when Mel’s not happy Debs not happy. I have been trying really hard to
keep things upbeat around but it seems impossible with Deb since Wednesday.
I am going to take her away from the house one day this week. Not sure what
we are going to do though. Any ideas?
I was wondering if anyone has a wireless network card
for a laptop and a wireless router that I could borrow or
purchase for a minimal cost. If you have one please email me. Just click on
my name on the home page.
Thank you for all the prayers or Melody and the rest of
our family. Please pray extra hard for Deb tonight. I feel like I am loosing
her. Please remember all our caringbridge and other friends tonight. Pray
for all the parents that with out there little ones. Pray for all the
parents that are facing a newly diagnosed child tonight.
God bless you all and thank for all that you have done
for us.
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/10
First of all Happy Anniversary Aunt Sissy and Uncle
Browne. Thank you for being there for us! We would be lost with out you.
Mel’s day has started out slowly as have the past few
days. And it was another day of not a lot of things done for her but she
managed to keep busy for most of the day. Lets see she did a lot more word
search puzzles (thank god for the internet), watched a little TV, and played
with her cousins. Speaking of her cousins, I started a sweet silly string
fight tonight. Mel didn’t really want to have anything to do it but we made
the best of it anyway. Devin, Allison, Skye and I went at it. Ok well I went
at it. I had a can in each hand and was letting loose. There was such a mess
when we got done with the 6 cans it took me about 30min to clean it up with
the vacuum. It was totally worth it!
Deb said something to me today I would like to address.
She said “It’s not fair!” “Why does this have to happen to her?” Well first
of all, why does it have to be any of these kids? This shouldn’t be
happening to any of our children, our children’s, children, but it is and it
will unless we step up to the plate and let some know we want it fixed and
we want it fixed NOW! Second it’s not fair! Not to our children not to us,
not to our family, friends and strangers. But what can we do about it? We
can enjoy the time we have! We can share what time we have left or what life
we have. And we have to morn the lost of our child. It’s not fair. There are
people out there who are killing there children because they can’t handle
it, or because they don’t want an ex to have them, or some other stupid
ridiculous bull shit reason. Why doesn’t it happen to them? Because it
didn’t it happened to us. We have to deal with it not because we want to
because we have to.
Deb is still not doing well. I see her slipping away a
little more each day. Slipping away along with Mel. I can not loose them
both! I will not loose them both! I will do what ever I have to do to keep
her hanging on!
Mel’s evening has been a little better than the rest of
the day. She is in a good mood and giggling some tonight. Thank you Cindy
for the offer to help out with the NIC card and Router. Thank you Mom and
Dad for everything you have done for us. Thank you Grammy for being there
for Deb.
Thank you ALL for everything, the prayers, the cards,
the packages for Mel and Devin, just everything. Please remember Deb in your
prayers tonight. Please remember all our caringbridge friends and there
families tonight.
God Bless you all
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/11
It’s day six for rain here sunny So. Cal. I had to use
my sin glasses for the first time in about 2 week’s fir about an hour. It’s
supposed to let up by morning. With that said Deb, Mel, and Bammom are going
to attempt a Target. That’s right I said Target and not SUPER WAL-MART. You
see Mel got a gift card in the mail and it is burning a hole in her pocket.
I will be good for her to get out side the house.
Mel kept busy today with word scrambles, cross word
puzzles, and of course math. She also had the TV on in the back ground most
of the day. She was pretty happy for the most part of the day. I have
noticed her right hand getting a little weaker the last few days. Tonight
she had to use her left hand to do a little book that you need to rub with a
pencil in order to see a little picture. Oh, I got paint on a few new
tattoos on her arms with her new tattoo machine. We did a heart on her left
arm and two cute dolphins.
Deb seems a little better today. We talked and cried
about hospice tonight. But agreed that we need to see what they can help us
with now. I never thought that I would see the day that I needed hospice for
my little girl. Anyway Deb reluctantly agreed. I hate having to make these
decisions. I hate all of this!
We are tired both mentally and physically. And I am
afraid that things are getting harder and harder as the days pass.
Thank you for all the all the prayers for Melody and
our family. Thank you for all the emails and GB (Guest Book) entries. Please
stop by all our caringbridge friends’ web pages and drop them an encouraging
message in there GB. Thank you for all that you do for us.
God Bless
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/12
Mel had a good day today giggling and laughing and just
keeping busy. She received a big gift from someone today. (I won’t say who
because I am not sure if they want me to)It is a portable DVD player. Mel
was surprised and very, very happy. To say the least she has spent a good
part of the day watching DVD’s. She even spent some of her medicine money at
target today and bought a few new DVD’s.
Mel also worked on some of her math and word puzzles.
That’s about it for today. Deb is doing ok today. We are going on Monday to
a counselor together. I made the call about hospice today.
My mind goes crazy during the day with things to share
with you all. But when I finally wind down from the day I loose most of it.
I am going to start writing things down so I do not forget.
One thing I did want to mention is this stupid probe
that NASA sent up to an asteroid today. Just so they could crash it into the
damm thing and inevitably destroy it and throw away are you ready for this
330 million dollars. I can only imaging what all the cancer research
company’s could have done with that kind of money. I could only shake my
head in disbelief.
Thank you for all the prayers for Mel and our family
and all our caringbridge friends. Good night and God Bless
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/13
Mel and Deb got a late start today. So to say the least
there is not a lot to talk about today.
Mel did some of her word puzzles today, watch some TV
and did a little bit of math. This afternoon Deb called the doctors office
to get her pain meds upped a bit because her back is hurting her. I guess my
back would hurt to if I was supposed to weigh 60lbs and but in reality
weight almost 140lbs. Deb also mentioned the Mel’s right side is swollen
especially her foot. I mean really swollen. So into the recliner she went
very, very reluctantly. She gets board to easy as it is. Sitting in the
chair makes it even worse. She can only do her word puzzles and math at the
table it is almost impossible for her to do it in the recliner.
Mel sat in the recliner for a short time and returned
to the table to eat some dinner. So we will be back to the battle of her
sitting in the recliner in just a little while. Deb went off the grocery
store and blew the stink off she was gone about an hour and a half or so.
She wasn’t doing to well after she spoke to the doctors office but seems to
be a little better tonight, but just a little.
To answer a question in the guest book from Jennifer,
the one about Devin using the DVD player. Are you kidding me if he even
looks at Mel says “Don’t even think about it Devin!” I am sure that after
the newness wares off it she will share it with him just fine. But then
again…….
Thank you all for everything you do for us. All the
letters, notes, cards, packages and gifts for the kids are wonderful. Please
keep the prayers for Mel coming as well as for all the children and the
families. I hope you are all doing well I thank God every night for you all
being in our lives and I ask him to bless you all. Thank you all of you at
my work for all the information and ideas you have suggested and for all the
prayers you have all told me about.
God Bless you all
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/14
Mel is eating with her left hand tonight. My heart is
aching!
Please pray tonight for our strength to get through
this. Please pray for Melody to not feel any pain physical or mental through
all this.
She had a pretty good day except for having to sit in
the recliner. I am home for the next three days so I will make sure she
spends a lot of time in the recliner. I hate being the bad guy but I know in
my heart it is for the best. None of us want to wind up in the hospital.
God Bless
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/15
Well it’s been ok around our house. Minus a few
episodes of fighting to get Mel in the recliner to put her feet up.
Let’s see, not really a whole lot to talk about since
she is spending time in the recliner. She did do some of her word puzzles
while she was at the table. She watched Charlottes Web on here DVD player
while she ate today. Aunt Sissy came over to with Allison and Skye to do
some valentines projects with the ladies. It was a pretty good day I guess.
Deb seems to be doing a little bit better again today.
We are both very upset about Mel’s right side. It is just about gone
completely. She does still write with it but, I did notice her switching
hands to cross of words in a word search today. I was talking to her about
it today and she got very upset about it not working. She said she is
scared, as are Deb and I. I am not sure Devin has noticed it as of today. I
will not be bringing it to attention; I will wait for him to mention it
before we talk about it.
Today has been a hard day for me. I am not really sure
why today is any different than another other day. I mean don’t get we
wrong, I have had bad days in the past but there were a lot of tears for me
today, mostly in the morning while I was alone and my mind was wondering.
But I made it through with a lot of praying.
Thank you for all the prayers for Melody and our
family. Thank you for remembering all our caringbridge friends. Please do
not stop asking our Heavenly Father for the miracle that we desperately
need.
I have wanted to mention the new chat room that Stan
has put up on the home page. Have any of you checked it out? Would you be
interested in using it? I was thinking about setting a time to be in there
so we can chat. I let you know what I come up with. There is also a new
photo album on the page. Now don’t get excited there aren’t any new pictures
as of yet, but the album is much nicer I think. And it has a slide show
function you can stop and then start again, you can change the length of
time each picture stays up and even how they change. If you click on the
picture of Melody in the top left corner of the home page it will take you
there. I sure hope it was ok that I mentioned that Stan.
Stan and his entire family have been very good to Mel
and our family since this all started and if it were not for him, we would
not have this great site to share with you all. Thank you Stan for all that
you do for Mel and our family.
Good night and God Bless
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/16
It’s been a good day for Mel today and for the most
part Deb also. The ladies (and Devin) had a very late night last night or
should I say a very early morning. They finally came to bed at 1am. Now I
have been going to bed some what early. I needed to catch up on some sleep.
Back to the ladies and to Devin. Let’s see it was about 11 when they finally
woke up and got there butts out of bed. It was great they were all in really
good news for the most part. Mel was in the best mood I have seen her in for
not being a morning person.
Mel went right to the recliner this morning as she does
every morning. After a while she wanted to have a little breakfast, so to
the table she went. While waiting for breakfast she worked on one of her
word puzzles. After breakfast she went right back the recliner and watched a
movie. Right after the movie Mel, Mommy, and Grammy went of to the store to
do some candy shopping. The candy is supposed to be for prizes for the games
Mel and the cousin’s play.
Later in the evening Allison and Skye came over for a
couple of those games to win a few candy prizes. They are in the other room
right now whooping it up like a bunch of while animals. Just kidding there
just being CRAZY! Mel’s mood changes for the better when ever the girls come
over.
Deb and I have an appointment together tomorrow with a
counselor. Grammy will be going home and Bammom and poppa will be coming
back up. I am not really sure if there is anything else to say. Some days
are good some days are bad. I try to make them good with my good sense of
humor and my GREAT looks. See what I mean.
J
This morning I went through the guest book and found
all the links that have been left in there. I placed them in the home page
under Melody’s friends. If I have added your child please check it. If you
would prefer a different title email me and I will be more than happy to
change it. If you prefer I take them off the list let me know I will
understand. I added 33 kids most with some kind of cancer. Some of those
have already been called home. I also added Angel to some kids that already
had links. It was very difficult to add that word. We have followed some of
these kids for sometime. You get to know them, they become apart of your
daily life. And although we did not know them for very long before there
calling, it still hurt. You feel some sort of loss in your life. I loved to
read about there adventures. I would check on them everyday. I would worry
about them.
You see I know how you all feel. I did and still do
today all the things you do. I hope that you never have to feel the pain
that I feel in my heart today. The pain of loosing one of your children. To
those parents that have lost a child and those facing it today, I would give
anything so you could keep your child, as I would do for Melody. ANYTHING!
Thank you for all the prayers for Melody and our
family. Please remember all of our caringbridge friends and there families
tonight. Please help us to find a way to not add anymore of our kids to that
list on the home page.
God Bless
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/17
Another pretty good day for Melody but not so good for
Deb. The counseling we went today I hope has helped her in some way. The
counselor we saw today was great. You see she had lost a child that was in
her teens. She understands what the feeling are and where they come from.
She also told us that the road ahead is a long. She spoke with us about some
other things that I think (I could be wrong) gave Deb some sort of calming
affect. I know this sounds crazy and would rather not go into details right
now but maybe some day.
Well enough about us on to the princess. Mel did a lot
of word puzzles today and spent some time (not as much as would have liked)
in the recliner today watching TV. OH and she was on the internet today with
the laptop. She went to Barbie.com and Poly Pockets.com. It was a little
difficult for to use the mouse with her left hand but she managed pretty
well. She got a little frustrated after awhile so she decided to have a bite
to eat. Allison and Skye came over for a brief visit tonight. They played
princess Yahtzee and go fish. Mel was in a pretty good mood most of the day
today.
Our long weekend was uneventful. We did a whole lot of
nothing for the entire weekend. Bammom and Poppa came up this afternoon and
Grammy returned home. Devin will go school and I will go to work. It all
sounds so….normal. But its not Bammom and poppa should be at home and Grammy
should have already been there. It should be, Devin AND Mel heading off to
school. And both Deb and I going off to work. That is NORMAL is supposed to
be. But it is not, not anymore. We just wait and wait and wait. As another
day passes we lose a little bit more of Mel! And a little bit of our self’s!
Good night and God bless
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/18
It was a beautiful summer like day here in Southern
California. Unfortunately Mel didn’t get outside to enjoy it. She just hung
around in the house. Mel worked on her word puzzles ALL DAY LONG. That’s it
that’s what she did today. Oh and watched cartoons. Nurse Mary, the School
district head nurse came by for a visit and Mel was pretty giggly. We
watched American Idol tonight and we ALL got a few good laughs from that.
Now do not get me wrong. NO WAY would you catch me up there.
She doesn’t really seem like herself today and tonight
she was writing with her left hand. We went up 1mg on the steroids with the
thought that it will give her a little use of that right hand. That’s about
the only change we have noticed as of right now.
Well I guess that’s about it for now. I was thinking
about setting up that time and date for the chat room thing. I figured it
would have to be sometime between 4pm and 5pm my time. That would give
everyone the opportunity join in if they so desired. I guess it would be
kind of a Q and A type thing. I’ll pick a day one day next week and let you
all know. Most likely the last part of the week. Oh, I have been getting a
lot of email and will catch to you all as time permits.
Thank you for all the prayers for Mel and our family.
Thank you for all the prayers for all our caringbridge friends. Please keep
them coming, for all of us, they are much needed. Tonight I leave you with
this.
"Let the little children come to me and do not
forbid them; for such is the Kingdom of God." Mark 10:14
Good Night and God Bless you all!
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/19
Well Mel’s day was pretty much the same as yesterday. I
didn’t hear her laugh as much this afternoon as she has the past few days.
So Mel pretty much did word puzzles today. And to the best of my knowledge
she hasn’t spent any time in the recliner except for right after she woke
up. Oh and course she did watch cartoons.
As for Deb….what can I say! She told me tonight she is
afraid for Mel. Afraid for her feeling pain and being scared. I can only be
there for her and listen, there is nothing I can say or do. I just don’t
know what to do or say! I feel those same things, I just deal with them in a
different way. One way is prayer, and a lot of it! You have no idea!
I think these kids know what is happening. They know in
someway, in there own way, what the out come is going to be. I think that
they know when it is time. I asked Mel tonight “What do think is going on
with that hand?” She said “I don’t know.” But I could tell that she has an
idea. I then asked her “Do you have any questions for me? Anything you want
to talk about?” So in true Melody form she said “Where do babies come from?”
Now can you guess what I did next? I’ll bet you think I went and got Mommy.
Nope. I said “Mommy’s tummies.” She said “I know that Daddy.” I said “When
Mommy’s and Daddy’s love each other so much that they want to share it with
babies.” I think that went pretty good.
I wish I could make this all go away. That’s supposed
to be my job. I used to be able to fix anything. I know in my mind that we
will get through this no matter how long it will take. But my heart tells me
other wise. It tells me that things never be the same and that it will
always hurt. I just wish I could do something for my wife and for Devin. I
have a feeling of helplessness. I have never felt that before in my life and
it really sucks, BAD!
Thank you so, so much for everything you do for us. All
the prayers, cards, packages, guest book entries, emails, and prayers.
Please don’t forget to check in all our caringbridge friends. Please pray
for a cure for this horrid beast we call cancer that consumes so many, many
lives.
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/20
I am sorry but I do not feel like doing a long update
tonight. Mel is doing fine she had a pretty good day. We had a rough night
last night putting her to bed she was in a lot of pain, it was in her back.
Deb is a mess today! I am not sure she will be able to
get through it all at this point. Everyday she gets worse! I will only be in
work a few hours tomorrow in order to be at home. My mom will hold down the
fort until I get home.
Devin is handling things pretty well. For a 10 year old
boy who notices everything I am very proud of the way he is handling it all.
Thank for all the prayers! Please, please ask our
father to give Deb strength to make it through all of this.
God Bless you all
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/21
Well Mel has had an up and down day. She was upset this
morning when Deb and I had to leave for an appointment. When we returned she
was ok, she was working an object search book. After that she was ok for
awhile and then later in the day while trying to convince her to put her
feet up in the recliner she had what I would call a serious breakdown. She
had a fit like nothing I have heard in a long while. She did wind up staying
in the recliner for about 2hrs or so.
Later in the evening Curt and Megan came over for a
visit and later even, Allison and Skye came over for a visit. They all
played a couple of different games until about 10:00 and Aunt Sissy came
over for the girls and Curt and Megan went home.
I do not want to get into details about Deb but I can
tell you this. Things are worse then you can ever imagine. And to the person
that knew what was happening. If you EVER and I mean EVER hold anything like
that back from again you will no longer be welcome here. If you think I am
kidding and won’t do that, TRY ME! That was twice, you do not want it to
happen again. Things were somewhat better today with Deb.
Mel has lost complete use of her right hand and it is
very, very hard for her to walk to and from the restroom. However she is
adapting pretty well. She does all her word puzzles and even changes the TV
channel with that left hand. I have been telling Deb for sometime that these
kids have a gift, the gift to adapt.
I wonder how much more I can take. My (our) entire life
has been turned upside down. Just when I think things are leveling off a bit
someone shakes me up and turns me upside down again. I never thought that
these things could have happened in my life. But they are. In some ways I
wish things were over but in other ways I want them to return to what they
were. My heart and my mind are so mixed up I do not know what to think or do
or even say sometimes.
Thank you for everything. God night and God bless
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
P.S. - My sister has arranged a fundraiser.
You can get the information on the events page. Thank you Sis I do not know
where we would be with out you!
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Update on Mel 1/22
Well toady was ok I guess. I went into work for a few
hours to catch up on some paperwork and the ladies slept in until almost
11am. When I got home I loaded Devin up in the truck and headed off to his
counseling appointment. We went from there to Target to pick up a few items
and a gift for a birthday that Devin is off to tomorrow. (HaHa I know what
your getting Jordan) Then Devin was starving, well he thought he was. So off
to the taco shop for some rolled tacos. We brought it home since we had been
gone for awhile. And surprise, when we arrived at the house there was Curt
cleaning out the inside of the car. (Thanks Curt the car looks great and
mean really great) So I warmed up some pizza and enjoyed the company.
Now mind you Devin and I were already out and about and
checked to see of anyone wanted anything, Shortly after arriving home Mel
decided she wanted subway (Plain turkey, that’s turkey and bread), So off to
subway went Grammy to get that sandwich. While Mel enjoyed that exciting
sandwich Deb was relaxing in the recliner and spending some time visiting
with her mom, Devin was playing a new Xbox game he got in the mail. (Thank
you, you know who you are. The game was perfect)
That brings us to this evening and tonight. Not only
did Curt do up the car like a pro, he bought dinner. Beef it’s was on the
grill. Mel wanted pizza for dinner so that what she got. Megan and Mel did a
few crossword puzzles before Curt and Megan had to head home. Mel is at this
moment still doing crossword puzzles.
I can not thank you all enough for all the emails and
guest book entries. Thank you all so much for all the prayers for Mel and
our family. And although I haven’t been able to visit any our friends this
week they are all in need of prayers for one thing or another. Tonight I ask
you to visit them and send them some of those wishes and prayers. Where
would we be with out you all! Thank you all again so much, good night and
God Bless.
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/23
WOW, early update tonight! Mel had an ok day today.
Nothing really to talk about, but even when she woke up she was in a pretty
good mood. Deb was also I a pretty good mood this morning. Mel went right to
the kitchen table this morning. That’s a first in a long while. Usually she
goes right to the recliner, but no this morning. She worked on a few
crossword puzzles and then had a little breakfast. Then she decided that it
was time to watch a move, so into the recliner she went. Lets see she
watched Tom and Jerry, she said she bought that one because it makes Daddy
laugh. She is right I really like that Jerry. She spent a good couple of
hours there.
Grammy went home in the afternoon. Mel just kind of
hung out at the table doing her crossword puzzles in the afternoon. Allison
and Skye came over for a visit this evening. Mel is eating KFC and the girls
are coloring some Sponge Bob pages we printed off the internet. I think we
will all try and get to bed at a decent hour tonight.
I have been reading a book that Roy, Cheyenne’s dad
sent us. One thing that stood out is this (My mom actually found it but I
would have to agree). We are not a body that has a soul. We are a soul that
has a body. There for people don’t die: only our bodies die. A few of our
bodies are defective when they are new and they break down quickly. I guess
one way to look at it is. Our souls continue on only or physical sense is
gone. As much as I will miss Melody’s body, her soul will still be alive.
Touching our lives, and many, many others. More lives then we can ever
imagine. It doesn’t make the pain go away but, in a small, and I mean small
way, it does give me comfort.
Deb had a few couple good moments today, but mostly a
down day for her. I love her so much! I want so much to take her pain away
from her. To make her laugh and smile. Some times she will force a smile.
The other night Mel had her laughing and smiling while getting ready for
bed. And just for a moment, a very quick moment, she was back again. Melody
was a chatty Kathy that night. Just like in the past. It was a wonderful
moment. And then back to reality. How I hate this reality!
My life does not “suck”. This moment in my life sucks.
And in the big picture of life this is all just a moment. I have had, and
will continue to have a great life. Living it to the fullest! And when I
think of Mel and all that she has gone through and will go through, I will
celebrate life with her today and in the future, we (Mel and I ) will
celebrate life together, FOREVER!
God bless you all in many, many great ways! Thank you
all for everything you do for us, but thank you especially for the things
you do for Melody, Devin and Deb. Keep the prayers a coming.
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
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Update on Mel 1/24
Mel day has been ok. She has worn her feeling on her
sleeves today. Most of the day has been spent on the word search puzzles
today with the TV on in the back ground. Mel, Deb and I managed to walk down
tot SUPER WAL-MART this afternoon to pick up a few items. That about wraps
up her day. We are down to San Diego for clinic tomorrow.
Deb also did ok today, we had a counseling appointment
today. I am hoping to get her out of the house for a few hours on Wednesday.
Just take a ride .and get her out of the house.
My folks have writing a letter and asked me to share it
with you. SO with that said I will leave it you it. Thank you for all that
you have done.
God Bless
Melody’s Daddy
Rob
Message from Bob & Terry
We want to give a Big Hello, and Big Heart Felt Thank
You! To all over our family, Friends and friends that we have not met, and
who overwhelmed us more that words can say with all the Love, Prayers, and
Support that has been given to Melody, Devin, Debbie & Robbie. Sorry it has
taken us so long to send this note our only excuse is dealing with live on a
daily basses. We are sure you all can relate, Bob being very busy with his
new job as a District Deputy for the Knights of Columbus, and Terry who is
always traveling back & forth from San Diego to Hemet making new dresses for
Melody and taking time to help with the house work. All we can say is there
is NO WORDS that can describe how we feel to our family about the terrible
disease that has stricken Melody.
We can not imagine what our Robbie & Debbie are going
through, we can only hope they know how much we Love them and that we are
there for them. We do believe in miracles and if God willing Melody will
receive her miracle. Please keep those cards, guestbook entries, and
prayers coming. Every time before Debbie or Robbie picks up the mail Melody
guesses as to how many letter, cards or packages she will receive today. It
is a highlight of her day. When the mail arrives every thing is shut off and
Debbie reads all of the cards, and letters that have come. If melody
receives candy in a package she invites her cousins over to play bingo, and
the winner receives candy as a prize. You should hear all the giggling that
goes on while playing the games or doing the word searches.
I know that in the past a request for prayers for a
miracle has been asked, I only ask please continue with those prayers. We
feel that the medical community has pretty much written Melody and the other
children diagnosed with her disease off. There needs to be SO MUCH more for
these families. From Doctors willing to step outside of the box, hospital
staff, pharmaceutical companies, insurance companies and support staff. Why
spend so much on space exploration when our future, children, are being
treated as second class citizens when stricken with severe illnesses.
Charity begins at home.
Thank You for making Melody smile and giggle. Some
where down the road there is work being done to raise money to replace the
income lost due to this monster of a disease. I hope we are able to plan
something that appeals to most of you and you may find it in your hearts to
lend a hand. Don’t forget Melody’s dollar Map. If you have not sent a card
from where you live; please do so. (Check out Melody dollar Map) Fellows
with the Knights of Columbus, hold a fundraiser. All help is truly
appreciated. Harmony Elementary is a terrific support sending meals and
overall support. Thank you all. We have started this thank you message many
times and it has yet to be posted. Something always comes up or we need to
add or change some information. Rob mentions he wants to mail a personal
thank you to each and every person who has touched Melody’s life. Be patient
and I am sure it will happen. However Terry and I want to let you know how
much we truly appreciate each and every one of you for your support for our
family.
Poppa Bob and Bammom Terry
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Update on Mel 1/25
Sorry about last nights update, missing words,
misspellings etc… I was half asleep when I wrote it. I read it this morning
and, DOH!
Tonight’s update is not going to be very long again I
am exhausted as are Mel and Deb. It was clinic day. I met the ladies at
11:00 and we didn’t get out of there until 2:30 and back to the house around
4:00 ARGG! Mel’s counts are good. We will start a new kind of chemo, well
new to Mel. It’s called VP16. Her Doctor thought since we were going to
continue with chemo we might as well try something different. The side
affects are similar to the Temador, little if any at all. She will start it
tomorrow. Mel’s feet are very swollen and I mean very. The Docs are
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